Web Design Agency — Brutally Honest
YOUR WEBSITE
MIGHT BE
UGLY.
Find out in 30 seconds. Get it fixed in 7 days.
340+Sites Roasted
94%Improvement Rate
$3.2MClient Revenue Generated
●🔥"They roasted our homepage. We doubled our leads in 60 days." — Sarah, accountant
●💀"Your CTA button is gray. GRAY. Nobody in the history of the internet has clicked a gray button." — real roast result
●🏆"Best $750 we ever spent. Our enquiries tripled." — Tom, plumber
●⚡"Your hero image is 6MB. Your bounce rate is 91%. These two things are related." — actual critique
●😭"This site looks like it was built in 2009 and then left alone." — roast result
●💰"Your about page talks about you for 600 words. Nobody cares." — real roast
●🚀"Fastest turnaround, best result. Absolutely worth it." — Maria, online coach
●✍️"Quality service for all your needs. Your competitors say the exact same thing." — actual headline we roasted
●🔥"They roasted our homepage. We doubled our leads in 60 days." — Sarah, accountant
●💀"Your CTA button is gray. GRAY. Nobody in the history of the internet has clicked a gray button." — real roast result
●🏆"Best $750 we ever spent. Our enquiries tripled." — Tom, plumber
●⚡"Your hero image is 6MB. Your bounce rate is 91%. These two things are related." — actual critique
●😭"This site looks like it was built in 2009 and then left alone." — roast result
●💰"Your about page talks about you for 600 words. Nobody cares." — real roast
●🚀"Fastest turnaround, best result. Absolutely worth it." — Maria, online coach
●✍️"Quality service for all your needs. Your competitors say the exact same thing." — actual headline we roasted
HOW IT WORKS
THREE STEPS.
ZERO SUGARCOATING.
Submit your site. Get a brutally honest critique. Get it fixed. That is the whole thing.
01
Submit Your URL
Paste your website link and tell us your industry and what you are trying to achieve. Takes 20 seconds.
02
Get Roasted
Our AI analyses your site across design, UX, speed, and conversion. You get a score, specific issues, and 3 quick wins.
03
Get Fixed
Choose a package and we rebuild it properly. 7 to 14 days. Clean code. No templates. Built to convert.
EXAMPLE ROAST
WHAT A ROAST
LOOKS LIKE.
This is an example of what you get when you submit your site above.
📋 Example Report
74
ROAST SCORE
"This site is sending your customers straight to your competitors"
Your homepage has more stock photos than a dentist waiting room. Your CTA button is gray — GRAY. Your hero text answers the question nobody asked. The good news? Every single one of these problems has a fix.
THE ROAST
Design
"Your color scheme was last seen in a 2008 corporate PowerPoint template"
✓ Pick 2 brand colors. Use them everywhere. Consistency = credibility.
CTA
""Contact Us" buried in the footer is not a strategy. It is a retirement plan for leads."
✓ Put a bright, specific button above the fold on every single page.
Speed
"Your site loads slower than a government portal during a power outage"
✓ Compress every image. That 5MB hero photo is chasing 80% of visitors away.
Copy
""Quality service for all your needs" — your three nearest competitors say the exact same thing"
✓ Write: "We help [WHO] do [WHAT] without [PAIN POINT]." One sentence. Done.
3 QUICK WINS YOU CAN DO TODAY
1.Put your phone number top-right on every single page — visible without scrolling
2.Change your hero headline to name one specific problem you solve for one specific customer
3.Make your main button orange or red — it genuinely converts better than any other colour
PRICING
WE BUILD
WEBSITES THAT
ACTUALLY WORK.
No templates. No offshore handoffs. Fast turnaround, real results.
STARTER
Get online fast. Look legit.
$750
7 Day Turnaround
A sharp, modern frontend website. Perfect for local businesses, tradespeople, and service providers who need to look professional online now.
- Custom design — no templates
- Up to 5 pages
- Mobile responsive
- Contact form
- Basic SEO setup
- 1 round of revisions
- Hosted and ready to launch
🔥 MOST POPULAR
PROFESSIONAL
The full package. No limits.
$1,500
7–14 Day Turnaround
A fully functional website with backend management. Unlimited pages, a CMS so you can edit content yourself, and all the integrations you need.
- Everything in Starter
- Unlimited pages
- Backend CMS — edit content yourself
- Blog or news section
- Email newsletter integration
- Analytics dashboard
- 2 rounds of revisions
E-COMMERCE
Built to sell. From day one.
$3,000
14 Day Turnaround
The complete online store setup. Payment gateways, delivery integrations, and a full e-commerce experience. Built to sell from day one.
- Everything in Professional
- PayPal + Card payments (Amex, Visa, Mastercard)
- AusPost & DHL delivery — already set up
- Full e-commerce store
- Order management dashboard
- Customer accounts & history
- 3 rounds of revisions + priority support
⚡ CUSTOM
ENTERPRISE
Built around your business.
Custom
Timeline based on scope
For businesses with complex needs, specific integrations, or large-scale requirements. We scope it out together and build exactly what you need — nothing off the shelf.
- Everything in E-Commerce
- Custom integrations & APIs
- Multi-location or multi-brand setups
- Advanced automation & workflows
- Dedicated project manager
- Ongoing support retainer available
- Fully custom scope — priced per project
Not sure which one? Submit your site above and we will tell you exactly what you need.
OUR WORK
WE DON'T JUST
ROAST. WE BUILD.
Here is a real site we built from the ground up.
✓ Live Site
Effie Kats
effiekats.com
A fully custom Shopify theme built from scratch for a premium Australian fashion brand. Dark luxury aesthetic, seamless checkout flow, loyalty rewards system, integrated booking, and a complete e-commerce backend.
CustomNo Templates Used
14dBuild Time
100%Custom Code
GET IN TOUCH
LET'S TALK
Got a project in mind? Send us a message and we'll get back to you within 24 hours.